For a lot of guys who start experiencing premature ejaculation one of the most difficult things to do will be to discuss the issue with their partner. It’s not like you both don’t know what’s going on. Of course you both do. still the shame that many guys feel when they first encounter this issue often causes them to ignore the issue completely.
This is often complicated by unrealistic expectations about what sex is and how long it should last. This is perhaps based on the prevalence of pornography in today’s society and the unrealistic portrayal of sexual intercourse that it all to often depicts.
Men are also likely to hear exaggerated of sexual bravado from there male friends and use that as a bench mark for their own performance in bed. That being said. If you are only managing to last a few minutes or less each time it’s more than likely that you won’t be able to satisfy your partner with this alone.
Opening The Lines Of Communication
This is why it’s so important to reach a stage where you’re comfortable enough to talk about the issue with your partner. While it’s no doubt going to be difficult to open those initial lines of communication what you’ll find is that once you do, you performance in bed is very likely to improve. Here’s why.
In the past, during the 60’s and 70’s is was popular to believe that many conditions including premature ejaculation where only caused by psychological triggers. While we don’t believe this to be true any more for most other conditions, there is no denying that the mental aspects do play at least a small role in premature ejaculation. (I believe that physical ejaculatory control skill play a much bigger role which we’ll discuss in a later article).
What men find who are able to discuss the premature ejaculation problems with their partner is that they become more comfortable around the issue which will great decrease their stress and anxiety levels. Once they are in this more relaxed state they have a much higher chance of being able to maintain control in bed.
This is especially so when you have a partner who is open and understanding about the problem. Once you have opened the dialog there are two important steps you can take.
Your Partner’s Needs
Firstly, you can discuss your partner’s sexual needs and make sure they are met. And secondly, you can work together to increase your ejaculatory control through premature ejaculation exercises and practice together.
Once you make a commitment to satisfy your partner by any means (weather that be penetrative or non-penetrative sex), you can then slow down and relax and experiment with techniques and positions that aid your endeavor to last longer in bed.
Getting Some Help
It may seem strange but having a partner who is willing to help improve your ejaculatory control is one of the most effective ways to overcoming early ejaculation. Once you let her know how various positions and techniques effect your levels of control you can use the “Edging” method to steady boost your lasting power.
Time To Start Talking
So if you are effected by premature ejaculation and haven’t discussed the issue fully with your partner maybe now is the time. No doubt the hardest part will be to swallow your pride and getting the initial conversation under way. Once you get it past this stage things are likely to be a lot easier. So why not give it a go tonight? Good luck with it.