How to Prevent Premature Ejaculation With The Right Attitude

Attitude is everything so the saying goes, and if you are one of the many men attempting to stop premature ejaculation it couldn’t be more true. Although a big part of improving your ejaculatory control is developing physical skills to last longer in bed it’s also crucial to have the right mindset. You could say that lasting in bed is 30% mental and 70% physical but that would be an oversimplification because as we will discuss, its not so easy to separate each of these factors.

In next week’s post I’ll be talking about how by training and developing your abilities, knowledge and skills in bed you will be automatically boosting your confidence and optimism because you know you have the newly developed skills that you can put into action. However there are a few simple changes to your perception and the way you think during sex that can start to make a difference right away.

How your thoughts effect your body

The reason why it’s so important to have the right mindset both before and during sex is because what these negative and anxious thoughts do is send subconscious messages into your body telling it to physically tense up. It’s then this physical tensing of the muscles within your body that leads to further tension leading first into your core muscles group and then further down into your pelvic and ejaculatory regions where it goes on to physically trigger you climax and ejaculation. You need to stop this where it starts, not were it finishes which is why it’s so important to regulate your thought to ensure they don’t spark this fire of involuntary tension.

Take it easy

Its easy to start stressing about all the things that might go wrong but you have to put all the right to the back of your mind and lighten up a little. Remember sex should be fun so share a joke with your girl and start thinking about the journey and not just the destination.  If you can give yourself a mindset where it’s not a huge problem if you happen to finish early. Once you accept it you are likely to find yourself being more relaxed which in tern will help you actually last longer.

Distract your negative thoughts

There’s a great way to take your mind off negative thoughts and that is to distract yourself, but keep reading because this is not what you think. Surely you have heard the old advice that you should think about baseball or something else nonsexual to take your mind of the arousal. Well there’s a much better way to do it and it is the opposite. Simple focus right in on your partner intensely. And I don’t mean just here erroneous regions but all of her. This is a great method to stop your mind wondering of to those negative thoughts that can be so detrimental.

De-stress beforehand

If you are stressed with work, bills or anything else, you need to get it out of you before you even think about sex otherwise you’ll be destined  to fail. Take some time to unwind. Do some deep breathing or even meditation and make sure that you are in the right frame of mind. Make sure the bedroom (or where ever else you have sex) is clean and has a relaxing vibe. Even put some relaxing music on softly in the background. All these little things can help avoid unnecessary stress.

Back up your confidence

The best method however to get the mental side of your game and confidence right is to give yourself reason to have a high level of self believe and the best way to do that is to work on all the physical skills that you can use to develop a superior control of your ejaculation. Author of the program Complete Ejaculation Control Aaron Parker explains at his site that both the mental and physical abilities can be improved at the same time

For example, as you continue to improve your physical control … you will naturally grow more confident and relaxed. This will automatically help you advance your mental control skills, and it also works the other way. As you develop the advanced mental control skills you are about to learn, these skills will make it much easier to develop your physical control exponentially.

Aaron Parker

I think Aaron makes a great point there. In the past people attempting to treat premature ejaculation tried to separate everything into the mental and physical but I think it’s now clear that you need a combined approach to be successful .

So remember the keys to the right mindset. Lighten up, focus on her to distract negative thoughts, de-stress and set the scene and mood prior to intercourse. I hope you get a chance to try these out soon. Good luck with it!

6 Ways To Last Longer In Bed

The times when we are alone and intimate with our partner should be something to look forwards to. Something that makes us feel alive and something that lets us relax and just enjoy ourselves, but for guys with premature ejaculation who don’t know how to last longer in bed, these times that should be great can end up being just the opposite and become a constant source of stress anxiety and a feeling of inadequacy.

It’s a shame that so many guys who struggle to last in bed don’t actively seek help as often they are simply too embarrassed and ashamed about this “little secret”.  This is really unfortunate because while it may surprise you even guys with sever premature ejaculation can learn to last much longer in bed by using some relatively easy-to-learn methods. So in this post I’ll be running through 6 of the best ways to improve you lasting ability and gain a higher level of control over you ejaculatory system.

1. Breathing

It’s so simple to get this right but you know what? It really does work to make a difference straight away. You should be taking deep long breaths and don’t just start doing it when you feel you arousal rising during sex. You need to begin breathing like  this before you even start intercourse. This will make sure you’re more relaxed right from the start giving your performance a really solid base to launch from.

2. Pace yourself

The key here is those first few minutes and getting through them. Once you have done this, the probability of you lasting longer will increase rapidly, so make sure to get your technique right from the start. There’s no use hammering away on top. Your much better to use a position where you’re more relaxed and to use more grinding motions giving you more of a chance to work yourself into form.

3. Tune into your partner

So many guys with premature ejaculation make the mistake during sex of thinking and worrying about what they are doing while they forget completely to focus (both mental and physically) on your partner. If you practice this a little it will soon become second nature to you and it work in quite a surprising way to help you last longer.  By focusing on your partner what you are really doing is distracting yourself from thinking only of the sensation on your penis and you worries and anxiety about the “what ifs” of you putting in a bad performance. If you can do this well, the goal is to be able to completely loose yourself in the moment where, as the saying goes, time flies.

4. Have the right attitude

Stress and worry is not going to do you any favors when your trying to perform in bed so you need to take some steps to turn it down a notch and relax. Try to lighten up a bit, share a joke with your partner and remind yourself that if it doesn’t all work out and you climax too soon that it’s not the end of the world. And remember that as you work on the other things you will get more confident which will intern make you feel more relaxed and confident.

5. Learn some cool down methods

Whether you have premature ejaculation or not it’s a great idea to know some cool down tricks that you can implement just in case you start to lose control and find yourself hurtling towards the point of no control. Adam Davey’s excellent book on how to stop premature ejaculation, Last Longer Now has a great list of a whooping 10 separate emergency tricks and techniques that are great for cooling the system down and helping you last longer in bed.

6. Start training

Serious about you skills in bed? Well why not start seriously training to boost your stamina in bed. Most guys with premature ejaculation can start getting great results after just 4 weeks of completing a specifically designed training program. While it’s hard to find a quality sex couch in person, there are some very good guides available that cover a large range of premature ejaculation exercises techniques.